For Humor

Elizamor · Post by **Elizamor** » Sun Mar 18, 2012 4:30 pm

read notice
The notice reads:
==========
Due to far too many deaths, the mayor can no longer find suitable candidates for guard duty.
- Gunther, Assistant to Mayor Dannal
==========

Was that me? :}

Kakoon · Post by **Kakoon** » Mon Mar 19, 2012 1:17 pm

Hey - where did Rias come from?

Rias moves toward a chestnut horse in an attempt to throw it.
Offense: 50100 vs Defense: 150
With a mighty roar, Rias picks up a chestnut horse and heaves it into the air!
A chestnut horse is sent hurtling southward!
You are knocked from your chestnut horse!
10 crush damage - to the head!
(energy -10)
Rias says, "Flying mount."

Rias was never here. You didn't see anything.

Post by **Rias** » Mon Mar 19, 2012 1:42 pm

[quote=Elizamor]read notice
The notice reads:
==========
Due to far too many deaths, the mayor can no longer find suitable candidates for guard duty.
- Gunther, Assistant to Mayor Dannal
==========

Was that me? :}[/quote]

That was from quite a while ago, when there were several invasions over and over in quick succession. The gatehouse guards were routinely overrun and killed, and nobody wanted the jobs anymore. Thus they built the gate further out in the canyon that exists today.

Lae · Post by **Lae** » Mon Mar 19, 2012 4:08 pm

A passing man attempts to covertly drop some gawdy curtains near the crate, muttering something about his wife's tastes before walking off quickly.

You pick up some frilly pink curtains covered in sparkly sequins.

EsAvd>

You glance at the frilly pink curtains covered in sparkly sequins in your hand and beam!

(Stealth mode, ENGAGED)

[Jaster's Private Home] (InUr)
This small wooden home consists of a single squarish room, its pine walls a faded grayish tinge. A small window near the front door does little to illuminate the home, the outside alley being shadowy and dim. Built into the eastern wall is a small stone fireplace.
The area is poorly-lit. The area is completely silent. The area is particularly warm.
You also notice a gray squat pine bed with a straw mattress, a gray square pine trunk (closed), a gray squat pine desk with some stuff on it, a gray long pine dresser, an orange wooden pumpkin bucket, a wooden watering bucket, a small lump of black coal and a cushioned pine bench.
Obvious exits: none.

EAvd>

You remove some frilly pink curtains covered in sparkly sequins from the leather backpack you are wearing.

EAvd>

You hang some frilly pink curtains covered in sparkly sequins on the wall.

[Jaster's Private Home] (InUr)
This small wooden home consists of a single squarish room, its pine walls a faded grayish tinge. A small window near the front door does little to illuminate the home, the outside alley being shadowy and dim. Built into the eastern wall is a small stone fireplace.
The area is poorly-lit. The area is completely silent. The area is particularly warm.
You also notice a gray squat pine bed with a straw mattress, a gray square pine trunk (closed), a gray squat pine desk with some stuff on it, a gray long pine dresser, an orange wooden pumpkin bucket, a wooden watering bucket, a small lump of black coal, a cushioned pine bench and some frilly pink curtains covered in sparkly sequins (hanging on the wall).
Obvious exits: none.

EAvd>

You nod.

EAvd>

You clap your hands at some frilly pink curtains covered in sparkly sequins.

Mischief managed!

Gad · Post by **Gad** » Mon Mar 19, 2012 4:54 pm

Man rule #1, Jaster: Don't move in with them.

Post by **Noctere** » Tue Mar 20, 2012 6:32 am

*grins*

Elizamor · Post by **Elizamor** » Tue Mar 20, 2012 8:25 pm

LOL! That just made my day!

Jaster · Post by **Jaster** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 10:40 pm

Lae continues chopping at a pine tree with her bronze axe.

A pine tree falls to the ground with a loud crash!

** Suddenly you realize the tree is falling directly toward A gray warhorse. TIMBER!

53 crush damage - to the left foreleg!
A gray warhorse tries to scramble out of the way but moves to slow! The tree strikes her, knocking her to the ground!

A gray warhorse stands up.

Hilarious.

Lae · Post by **Lae** » Mon Mar 26, 2012 11:02 pm

[quote=Jaster]Lae continues chopping at a pine tree with her bronze axe.

A pine tree falls to the ground with a loud crash!

** Suddenly you realize the tree is falling directly toward A gray warhorse. TIMBER!

53 crush damage - to the left foreleg!
A gray warhorse tries to scramble out of the way but moves to slow! The tree strikes her, knocking her to the ground!

A gray warhorse stands up.

Hilarious.[/quote]

I broke your warhorse :<

Elizamor · Post by **Elizamor** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 10:06 pm

[OOC - Little Niftyest the Fugitive]: it would be soo funny if someone walked by me when I was changing into my greaves XD

[OOC - Fluffy Lae]: that's your cue Kiyaani

[OOC - Little Niftyest the Fugitive]: LOL

[OOC - Kiyaani]: >.>

[OOC - Kiyaani]: i was actually thinking the same thing earlier when repairing my armor

[OOC - Fluffy Lae]: that's what you get for wearing armor

[OOC - Kiyaani]: well i'm not going to fight rats in my underoos

[OOC - Fluffy Lae]: why not?

Lae · Post by **Lae** » Tue Mar 27, 2012 10:32 pm

[OOC - Little Niftyest the Fugitive]: Now children sing Suffication, mental retardation! suffication! the game we like to play!
[OOC - Little Niftyest the Fugitive]: first you take a plastic bag, then you put it on your head! go to sleep, then you're dead...woaaaah!

* You hear a deep bell toll in your mind, followed by the name "Niftyest."

Elizamor · Post by **Elizamor** » Wed Mar 28, 2012 1:50 pm

It's all about the timing

Avedri · Post by **Avedri** » Mon Apr 02, 2012 3:42 pm

Regarding Master Shredder:

Speaking to the corpse of a dirty rat, you say, "May he have mercy on your dirty little soul."

EAvd>
You bury the corpse of a dirty rat.

Lae · Post by **Lae** » Mon Apr 02, 2012 3:50 pm

[quote=Avedri]Regarding Master Shredder:

Speaking to the corpse of a dirty rat, you say, "May he have mercy on your dirty little soul."

EAvd>
You bury the corpse of a dirty rat.[/quote]

Splinter woman, SPLINTER!

You've been sending all those rats to the guy who wants to kill all those rats!

You've been DAMNING them to rat HELL.

>:P

Avedri · Post by **Avedri** » Mon Apr 02, 2012 5:14 pm

This is what I get for watching girl cartoons. =P

Lae · Post by **Lae** » Mon Apr 02, 2012 5:24 pm

[quote=Avedri]This is what I get for watching girl cartoons. =P[/quote]

I bet you could tell me what color Jem always wore.

..but then again I could too..

Avedri · Post by **Avedri** » Mon Apr 02, 2012 5:32 pm

I demand star-shaped amethyst earrings!

Evelyn · Post by **Evelyn** » Tue Apr 03, 2012 10:48 am

Kinda awkward moment

Kian just arrived.

store ear
You pay the storage fee of 0 riln and hand your Kian ear to a bank teller, who promptly stores it in the bank vault for you.

You giggle!

Kian snickers.

Reynard · Post by **Reynard** » Tue Apr 03, 2012 11:29 am

Why's it only cost 0 riln to store his ear? It cost me 20 riln to store a large pine stave.

...Ooooooh, it's based on relative worth.

Rasui · Post by **Rasui** » Tue Apr 03, 2012 11:30 am

[OOC - Fluffy Ameris]: Is this Rasui person new?

[OOC - Fluffy Ameris]: I do not remember him.

[OOC - Ursian Evelyn]: He's new to me too, but he's nifty!

[OOC - Rasui]: What little is known about him is that he appreciates being talked about as if he were not there.

[OOC - SGM Landion]: I love how you guys talk about him as if he's not there.

[OOC - SGM Landion]: Hey!

A shaft of soft blue-white light descends upon you!
(energy +50)
** Landion just blessed Rasui!

Evelyn · Post by **Evelyn** » Tue Apr 03, 2012 11:33 am

XD Kian is priceless!

Lae · Post by **Lae** » Wed Apr 04, 2012 9:04 pm

Shiela just arrived.

Shiela shouts!

You giggle!

You hurl a blackberry pie at Shiela!
A blackberry pie hurtles toward Shiela! (!) (R: 50 vs D:47)
0 squashy damage to the back!
Shiela is covered in splattered pie!
Roundtime: 4 seconds.

You notice a white and brown spotted horse trace the flight path of your blackberry pie back to your hiding spot.

Shiela begins crying.

You exclaim, "PIE!"

Shiela sits down.

[Shadgard, Town Commons] (OutUr)
A statue of a robed woman stands here in a circular plaza of earthen-hued cobblestones. Two circles of wooden benches have been placed around the plaza, one running the outer circumfrence of the plaza and facing inward, the other circling the base of the statue and facing outward. The plaza serves as a popular place for townsfolk to meet, visit and do business. A well-maintained road of cobblestones heads southward, while dirt paths lead to other sections of the town. On the north side of the plaza lies the Town Hall.
There is a small crowd of people here. The area is somewhat noisy.
You also notice a wooden storage crate, a large notice posted on the Town Hall door, a large post board, a scroll-shaped sign and a wooden trash barrel.
Also here: your white and brown spotted horse and [[Shiela (sitting, splattered with pie)]].
Obvious paths: west, north, east, south.

You see Shiela.
She is about five and a half feet tall and appears to be youthful. She has straight long auburn hair and piercing blue-green eyes. Her skin is ashen and her body's build is athletic.
She is wearing a small clear crystal pendant, a yellowed bone choker, a gray leather satchel, a midnight blue canvas satchel, a backpack, a cloak, a tunic, a belt, a leather haft-frog carrying a logging axe, a leather scabbard, some lamellar greaves (scuffed) and a pair of boots (scuffed).
She is covered in splattered pie!

Shiela has been defeated.

* You hear a deep bell toll in your mind, followed by the name "Shiela."

Murdered by pie. Sweet Irony.

Elizamor · Post by **Elizamor** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:13 am

Pie...

Bryce · Post by **Bryce** » Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:32 am

I'm going to start training Hurl Weapon like mad, just so I can be more accurate when throwing pies and fish at people.

Evelyn · Post by **Evelyn** » Fri Apr 06, 2012 7:02 am

That's amazingly funny! XD