Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 8:58 pm
You retrieve a steel utility knife from your backpack and skin the corpse of an infested racoon, yielding 1 cougar pelt.
CLOK BBS
A roleplaying mid-fantasy/western frontier/gaslamp MUD
https://clok.contrarium.net/bbs/
For Humor
Page 7 of 27
Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 8:58 pm
Next time make it OMFGWTFBBQRAGEQUIT! damage.
Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 9:27 pm
You ask, "Why aren't I a mentor Rias?"
EEng>
Rias removes a malformed copper-lump from his weathered canvas duffle bag.
You peer quizzically at Rias.
EEng>
Rias says, "Because you're a horrible person."
laugh
You laugh!
EEng>
Evelyn removes a blackberry tart from her midnight blue many-pocketed leather backpack.
Lae gets up off a squashy armchair.
Rias removes a malformed copper-lump from his weathered canvas duffle bag.
"good point
You say, "Good point."
EEng>
Lae hurls a blackberry tart at you
A blackberry tart hurtles toward you!
You slap the blackberry tart out of the air with your hand!
EEng>
Rias removes a malformed copper-lump from his weathered canvas duffle bag.
You peer quizzically at Rias.
EEng>
Rias says, "Because you're a horrible person."
laugh
You laugh!
EEng>
Evelyn removes a blackberry tart from her midnight blue many-pocketed leather backpack.
Lae gets up off a squashy armchair.
Rias removes a malformed copper-lump from his weathered canvas duffle bag.
"good point
You say, "Good point."
EEng>
Lae hurls a blackberry tart at you
A blackberry tart hurtles toward you!
You slap the blackberry tart out of the air with your hand!
Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:41 pm
We need more OOC Mentor Lounge gatherings.
Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:44 pm
[quote=Rias]We need more OOC Mentor Lounge gatherings.[/quote]
This. I need more GM's to throw pie at. (Landion is next.)
This. I need more GM's to throw pie at. (Landion is next.)
Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 12:33 pm
Oh no! None of use are safe from the PIE.
Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 3:42 pm
Thanks for the new sig Rias!
Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 3:57 pm
I live to serve!
Posted: Sat Apr 28, 2012 4:43 pm
A chestnut horse has been defeated.
A chestnut horse slowly regains consciousness.
Zombie horse Ayla!
A chestnut horse slowly regains consciousness.
Zombie horse Ayla!
Posted: Sat Apr 28, 2012 4:59 pm
glance
You are holding a backpack (open) in your right hand and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and a rough oak flitch in your left hand.
17 hands!
You are holding a backpack (open) in your right hand and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and some strawberries in your left hand.
and a rough oak flitch in your left hand.
17 hands!
Posted: Sat Apr 28, 2012 5:02 pm
Wow! I'm jelly. 
Posted: Sat Apr 28, 2012 5:39 pm
I'm a 17 armed octopus.
Posted: Sat Apr 28, 2012 8:30 pm
[ESP-GRAY - Acarin]: Are you requesting my company River?
[ESP-GRAY - River]: I would never request your company unless I needed a pinata or someones arse to use as a pencil sharpener
[ESP-GRAY - Acarin]: You're quite a humorous little girl.
[ESP-GRAY - River]: the only thing little would be ... well I'm keeping it clean
[ESP-GRAY - Acarin]: It's not the size of my claws that count. It's how well they penetrate your throat.
[ESP-GRAY - River]: I would never request your company unless I needed a pinata or someones arse to use as a pencil sharpener
[ESP-GRAY - Acarin]: You're quite a humorous little girl.
[ESP-GRAY - River]: the only thing little would be ... well I'm keeping it clean
[ESP-GRAY - Acarin]: It's not the size of my claws that count. It's how well they penetrate your throat.
Posted: Tue May 01, 2012 7:57 am
You pet a chestnut horse.
(Type stop to stop auto-logging.)
You look but can't locate any horse trees here.
(Type stop to stop auto-logging.)
You look but can't locate any horse trees here.
Posted: Tue May 01, 2012 7:12 pm
No pie fights in the Church please!!!
The templar Aelwyn says, her voice muffled by a steel greathelm, "I do not hold any ill will towards you but could I ask you all to please take the pie fights... outside."
You fidget.
Evelyn gasps!
Evelyn says, "Sorrrry."
(Jaster points outside.)
You say, "We keep getting thrown out of places, it's amazing."
You join Jaster.
The templar Aelwyn kindly nods.
Speaking to the templar Aelwyn, Jaster quietly asks, "Out there?"
You pull Evelyn toward you.
Evelyn joins Jaster.
The templar Aelwyn points towards the door.
Speaking to the templar Aelwyn, Jaster quietly asks, "Oh.. so it's this door?"
Evelyn giggles!
(Jaster points at the door.)
The templar Aelwyn covers her face with her palm.
Speaking to the templar Aelwyn, Jaster quietly asks, "Are you sure you just don't want some pie?"
Speaking to the templar Aelwyn, Jaster quietly says, "I'll bring a nice hot one to you."
Jaster winks at the templar Aelwyn.
Evelyn says, "It's pretty yum."
The templar Aelwyn kindly shakes her head at jaster.
Speaking to Jaster, you say, "I don't think she likes it hot."
Jaster quietly says, "I suspect not."
Evelyn snickers.
The templar Aelwyn says, her voice muffled by a steel greathelm, "I do not hold any ill will towards you but could I ask you all to please take the pie fights... outside."
You fidget.
Evelyn gasps!
Evelyn says, "Sorrrry."
(Jaster points outside.)
You say, "We keep getting thrown out of places, it's amazing."
You join Jaster.
The templar Aelwyn kindly nods.
Speaking to the templar Aelwyn, Jaster quietly asks, "Out there?"
You pull Evelyn toward you.
Evelyn joins Jaster.
The templar Aelwyn points towards the door.
Speaking to the templar Aelwyn, Jaster quietly asks, "Oh.. so it's this door?"
Evelyn giggles!
(Jaster points at the door.)
The templar Aelwyn covers her face with her palm.
Speaking to the templar Aelwyn, Jaster quietly asks, "Are you sure you just don't want some pie?"
Speaking to the templar Aelwyn, Jaster quietly says, "I'll bring a nice hot one to you."
Jaster winks at the templar Aelwyn.
Evelyn says, "It's pretty yum."
The templar Aelwyn kindly shakes her head at jaster.
Speaking to Jaster, you say, "I don't think she likes it hot."
Jaster quietly says, "I suspect not."
Evelyn snickers.
Posted: Tue May 01, 2012 9:30 pm
A chestnut horse stops pulling a pine-planked wagon.
Your hiding spot is revealed by a chestnut horse!
A chestnut horse throws a punch at you! (M: 115 vs D:111 P:103)
Dodged!
A chestnut horse throws a punch at you! (M: 115 vs D:111 P:103)
Parried by a sleek black poignard!
Since when did horses get hands?
Your hiding spot is revealed by a chestnut horse!
A chestnut horse throws a punch at you! (M: 115 vs D:111 P:103)
Dodged!
A chestnut horse throws a punch at you! (M: 115 vs D:111 P:103)
Parried by a sleek black poignard!
Since when did horses get hands?
Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 11:31 am
Badass horse.
Also this amused me. I am silly sometimes.
You ask, "Ever been scared of me?"
Kian shakes his head.
shout roar
You tap into the power of the Great Bear Spirit, allowings its might and majesty to flow through you!
You let loose with a mighty roar!
Kian flees southward in fear!
ESP-GRAY - Evelyn]: Lies!
Also this amused me. I am silly sometimes.
You ask, "Ever been scared of me?"
Kian shakes his head.
shout roar
You tap into the power of the Great Bear Spirit, allowings its might and majesty to flow through you!
You let loose with a mighty roar!
Kian flees southward in fear!
ESP-GRAY - Evelyn]: Lies!
Posted: Mon May 07, 2012 1:47 pm
You see Alexander.
He is about six feet tall and appears to be in the prime of life. He has thick very short black hair and brooding blue-gray eyes. His skin is fair and his body's build is average.
He is holding a steel greathelm in his right hand.
He is wearing a charcoal gray tabard emblazoned with a gold-flamed white candle, a steel gorget, an intricate white ash Serafina pendant strung on a thin silver chain, an ancient iron kite shield engraved with the symbol of a burning torch, a blue hooded cotton cloak, a steel breastplate, some steel scale bracers, a polished holly-bead bracelet, a pair of steel gauntlets, a belt, a belt pouch, a copper keyring, a leather scabbard, some steel scale greaves, some socks and a pair of steel sabatons.
He is being flanked by Tian.
He is being flanked by Tian.
He is being flanked by Tian.
He is being flanked by Tian.
He appears oblivious to the world.
This is what happens when the local Utasa is bored.
He is about six feet tall and appears to be in the prime of life. He has thick very short black hair and brooding blue-gray eyes. His skin is fair and his body's build is average.
He is holding a steel greathelm in his right hand.
He is wearing a charcoal gray tabard emblazoned with a gold-flamed white candle, a steel gorget, an intricate white ash Serafina pendant strung on a thin silver chain, an ancient iron kite shield engraved with the symbol of a burning torch, a blue hooded cotton cloak, a steel breastplate, some steel scale bracers, a polished holly-bead bracelet, a pair of steel gauntlets, a belt, a belt pouch, a copper keyring, a leather scabbard, some steel scale greaves, some socks and a pair of steel sabatons.
He is being flanked by Tian.
He is being flanked by Tian.
He is being flanked by Tian.
He is being flanked by Tian.
He appears oblivious to the world.
This is what happens when the local Utasa is bored.
Posted: Mon May 07, 2012 1:56 pm
Alexander intones a stirring chant.
Alexander closes his eyes a moment.
Alexander's eyes flash open with a burst of golden light, his face set in an expression of grim determination.
You quietly ask, "Kaio-what?"
A brilliant flash of light flares outward from Alexander!
Lae draws back from the blinding light!
Tian draws back from the blinding light!
Evelyn draws back from the blinding light!
You draw back from the blinding light!
Roundtime: 3 seconds.
Alexander holds his ancient iron kite shield engraved with the symbol of a burning torch in front of him and charges at Tian! (Off: 2361 vs Def: 206)
Alexander knocks Tian flat!
Alexander closes his eyes a moment.
Alexander's eyes flash open with a burst of golden light, his face set in an expression of grim determination.
You quietly ask, "Kaio-what?"
A brilliant flash of light flares outward from Alexander!
Lae draws back from the blinding light!
Tian draws back from the blinding light!
Evelyn draws back from the blinding light!
You draw back from the blinding light!
Roundtime: 3 seconds.
Alexander holds his ancient iron kite shield engraved with the symbol of a burning torch in front of him and charges at Tian! (Off: 2361 vs Def: 206)
Alexander knocks Tian flat!
Posted: Mon May 07, 2012 2:01 pm
The squire Bors hurls a blackberry tart at Tian
A blackberry tart hurtles toward Tian! (R: 143 vs D:31)
0 squashy damage to the left arm!
Tian is covered in splattered pie!
A blackberry tart hurtles toward Tian! (R: 143 vs D:31)
0 squashy damage to the left arm!
Tian is covered in splattered pie!
Posted: Mon May 07, 2012 2:15 pm
[5:09:51 PM] Ardor: Want me to show you on a doll where the spirit touched me?
[5:10:22 PM] Lae: yes
[5:10:35 PM] Ardor: A withered spirit reaches out to touch you! (M: 218 vs D:185 P:126)
6 cold damage -- to the abdomen, greatly deflected by a glossy black cuirass.
(energy -6)
[5:10:22 PM] Lae: yes
[5:10:35 PM] Ardor: A withered spirit reaches out to touch you! (M: 218 vs D:185 P:126)
6 cold damage -- to the abdomen, greatly deflected by a glossy black cuirass.
(energy -6)
Posted: Mon May 07, 2012 7:10 pm
You shove at Jaster with both hands! (M: 1483 vs D:934)
7 bludgeon damage to the right eye!
*** Jaster falls to the ground, defeated!
A pair of medics run in, heave Jaster's body onto a stretcher, and rush off to the infirmary.
(energy -5)
Roundtime: 6 seconds.
7 bludgeon damage to the right eye!
*** Jaster falls to the ground, defeated!
A pair of medics run in, heave Jaster's body onto a stretcher, and rush off to the infirmary.
(energy -5)
Roundtime: 6 seconds.
Posted: Mon May 07, 2012 7:11 pm
Rias pulls a pin out from a combustible lemon.
Rias hurls a lemon at you! (R: 62549 vs D:206)
2 crush damage - to the left hand!
(energy -2)
*** You fall to the ground, defeated!
A pair of medics run in, heave your body onto a stretcher, and rush off to the infirmary.
Rias hurls a lemon at you! (R: 62549 vs D:206)
2 crush damage - to the left hand!
(energy -2)
*** You fall to the ground, defeated!
A pair of medics run in, heave your body onto a stretcher, and rush off to the infirmary.
Posted: Mon May 07, 2012 7:13 pm
Rias points his lightning rod at Jaster!
Rias gestures at Jaster.
A searing bolt of lightning arcs toward Jaster. (R: 12550 vs D:986)
49 electric damage - to the left hand, partially deflected by a pair of bronze-knuckled fingerless caestus.
Tendrils of electricity crackle and fork outward from the main bolt!
Acarin just arrived.
Rias points his lightning rod at Jaster!
Rias gestures at Jaster.
A searing bolt of lightning arcs toward Jaster. (R: 12550 vs D:986)
57 electric damage - to the left hand, partially deflected by a pair of bronze-knuckled fingerless caestus.
Tendrils of electricity crackle and fork outward from the main bolt!
Rias points his lightning rod at Jaster!
Rias gestures at Jaster.
A searing bolt of lightning arcs toward Jaster. (R: 12550 vs D:986)
51 electric damage - to the right hand, partially deflected by a pair of bronze-knuckled fingerless caestus.
Tendrils of electricity crackle and fork outward from the main bolt!
You say, "Wow."
Rias gestures at Jaster.
A searing bolt of lightning arcs toward Jaster. (R: 12550 vs D:986)
49 electric damage - to the left hand, partially deflected by a pair of bronze-knuckled fingerless caestus.
Tendrils of electricity crackle and fork outward from the main bolt!
Acarin just arrived.
Rias points his lightning rod at Jaster!
Rias gestures at Jaster.
A searing bolt of lightning arcs toward Jaster. (R: 12550 vs D:986)
57 electric damage - to the left hand, partially deflected by a pair of bronze-knuckled fingerless caestus.
Tendrils of electricity crackle and fork outward from the main bolt!
Rias points his lightning rod at Jaster!
Rias gestures at Jaster.
A searing bolt of lightning arcs toward Jaster. (R: 12550 vs D:986)
51 electric damage - to the right hand, partially deflected by a pair of bronze-knuckled fingerless caestus.
Tendrils of electricity crackle and fork outward from the main bolt!
You say, "Wow."
Posted: Mon May 07, 2012 8:43 pm
Like a BOSS!Tester suddenly appears as if from thin air!
Tester a jagged ice spear at you!
A jagged ice spear hurtles toward you! (R: 75058 vs D:136)
Dodged!